I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Randomize
