What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Randomize
