can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
Randomize
