you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
Never let your siblings swipe right.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize
