I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
We are two peas in an std pod
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
These People Are The Epitome of Lazy
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
Disturbing Scenes People Witnessed As Children
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.