Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
Randomize