just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Randomize
