Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Randomize
