I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
Randomize
