question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
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