I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
The air taste purple.
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