I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
Randomize
