I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
Randomize
