why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
Randomize
