The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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