is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
It's official drugs can't kill me
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Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
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