Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Randomize
