i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Randomize
