He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Randomize
