We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Just checked my missed calls... why did you call me 37 times from 2:14 to 3:58?
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
Randomize