yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
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