How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Randomize
