ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
