So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
