I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
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