Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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