Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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