I am puke
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
