For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
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