somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
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