After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
It's no shave November. This is our time.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
Randomize
