Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
she told me i tasted like america
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Randomize
