? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Randomize
