i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
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