I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
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