You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
