Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
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