If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
