butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
YAS. BRING CRAB.
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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