Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
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