Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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