THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
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