I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
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