i took some ambien and I TRIPPED out...i went into my mom's room to say goodnight and i don't remember anything...she said that i got really pissed at her because we were living in the Keebler elf tree and she was visiting other trees, then i started laughing hysterically and she goes "whats so funny?" and i go "there are 7 people sitting on my knees" and she goes "doesn't that hurt?" and i said "no we're sitting in a bowl" and then i capped it off and said "join the crazy train bro" and passed out.
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
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