He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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