i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
Randomize
