why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
My feet surprised me
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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