I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
30+ People Share Their Worst ‘Intimate Experience’ And They’re Traumatizing
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
25 Shocking High School Scandals You Won’t Believe Are True
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
Randomize
