Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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