he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
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