its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
