I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
Life is so much better after having sex.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
We don't watch enough power rangers
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
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